Hello holidays!

Woo! Finished my english paper today and handed in my textile design too. :)

Forgot to put in my research for textiles but screw it lah. I was damn tired.

I tell you my sleeping habits are damn imba.

Amanda asked me why I was so tired today and I told her I couldn't sleep. She said that I told her that I was going to shower and sleep when she went to bed at 2.30 am.

I slept around 3.30 am.

Huh?

Okay, I know I put some finishing touches on my textiles and chatted to Helyna for a bit, but what happened to the 2 hours? =_=?

I went to bed at 3.30 and I had another panic attack. :(

I've had 3 since I arrived in Melbourne.

I can't explain why it happens - it just does.

It starts out with something minor - inability to sleep and restlessness.

Few minutes later my heart starts pounding uncontrollably and I started to hyperventilate.

=_____= And don't tell me it was because I was nervous about my exam - o0o it was only English and I have NEVER freaked for a test before.

I don't even know why but horrible images were just flashing through my head - nightmares on video played in full technicolour and I couldn't stop them.

It's worse than having nightmares in your sleep, cause you just wake up and it's all gone - you forget about them immediately most of the time.

Imagine being wide awake with your eyes open and seeing things that terrify you, one after another.

...

I remained curled up in my blanket for almsot 45 minutes before I picked up my phone and texted Sam. T__T

Half of me was hoping he'd reply and the other half of me was hoping he'd sleep through it cause he had work the next day and I didn't want him to be zombified.

But my sweet, sweet boyfriend called me at 2.30 am Msian time even though he gets up for work at like, 6 something and talked to me for a good 15 minutes to calm me down; he even sang to me so I could sleep.

Tell me where you get such awesome people lah. *_* /wipes tear

I fell asleep almost immediately after he hung up, though my heart was still beating erratically.

Fast, then slow, then fast again. Heart problem already la.

:(

I love my Sam :D

I had a nap at Amanda's house just now while waiting for 6pm so I could hand my assignment in. I had more nightmares.

...

Lots of blood and violence and death. =_=

I'm going crazy edi eh.

Can't wait to go home and curl up in bf's arms and sleep. T_T

4.5 days, Malaysia, hot weather and milo ais, here I come!