You hackerlicious babe :D

Note: Non-gamers should probably skip this post unless extremely bored and enjoys reading through piles of gaming jargon and references :)


I was reading through some CS clan blogs earlier and it was mind-boggling to see how seriously they take gaming. @__@

It was rather amusing to see how people start to use proper grammar and punctuation when they start to argue or get a point across. I mean it's good la, that people are finally speaking properly...but sai mm sai so serious ah?

We're mostly (if not all) Malaysians so there shouldn't be any issue with communicating in rojak language right? I actually noted this 'I must gain the upper hand and win my argument by sounding more intelligent' behaviour years ago on the Neoboards (Neopets forums) when I was 12 or so.

But anyway, where there are games, there will always be hackers. And I will never trust any player until I have watched the person play in front of me (most likely in a cc.)

The only Garena CS players I've met and played with in person are my boyfriend (of course, mister kamona,) JK, Fery, Fezor, Noobster, and Alex (actnoob.)

And even though a number of them fong shui when we played, they're definitely as good as they seem online.

If I haven't met and played with someone in real life or at least get to know their personality better, I never trust the person 100%. Sure, there are some that I trust more than others (I love you Hely <3) but sometimes I even doubt friends - because some people are just not who they seem online.

In my opinion, I have one of the worst playing styles I have ever seen, and people still manage to accuse me of hacking. I have rarely gone a day without being forcibly removed (ha ha nice way of saying kicked) from a server after being diu-ed gaogao.

And with 300+ ping too.

This just leads me to believe that the population of noobs are increasing by the day.

When people accuse me of walling (the most common accusation) I normally laugh it off, but somehow I get super pissed off if someone says my boy is hacking.

It is unacceptable! I'm not sure why I'd feel so indignant for someone else and not myself, but I think it's because I see him as a very good and efficient player and it is TOTAL injustice that he gets accused of being a noob...when I'm just sub-par, the accusations don't mean very much.

Even though he's my boyfriend, I'm sometimes in awe when he's teaching me new tricks or techniques (wtf fangirling -.-)

But anyway, back to this new generation of players that inherited the Garena we left behind. :'(

Most of them suck, a LOT of them are hacking (heat-seeking bullets anyone?), and almost everyone kicks either me or my bf out of games.

It is nearly impossible to have a decent game together. If either one of us hosts, they get pawned and leave so there's no one left to play with.

I've even been banned for teasing a host about his recoil control script. And I was being nice already! (Note: 'teasing' not 'scolding') D: And don't even try to tell me you're not hacking when you have 0 recoil - not even the jerky recoil that some scripts have, but your crosshair DOES NOT MOVE UP AT ALL.

And then the hacker's friend has the cheek to come and add me on facebook because I'm a girl! Wtf?

One day, this little boy, Anand, hosted and I joined anonymously - I didn't even know it was him at first. I went in...and was scolded and kicked on the first round.

What happened was, I joined late and my teammates all died early on - the last one at alley doors. So, I jogged out through the stairs and started walking from the catwalk, heading towards the doors.

I just reached the doors, preparing to jump around and check the corner when I heard a knife being drawn. Immediately I swung around, banged the door and BOOM headshot on little Anand.

'hacker. he knows i'm there wtf'

*KICKED*

Well, excuse me, but what the fuck? -.- At least do me the courtesy of spectating me before you make a judgement and kick.

And I hope he was just drawing the knife for fun - if not the little creep is certainly hacking because I walked all the way from catwalk, so there's no way he could have heard me. The timing was too sweet to be a coincidence.

I rejoined, explained that I heard his knife - to be met with more cries of 'hacker!' and being kicked again. I promptly fired off a message to him on facebook (he just added my bf as a friend) telling him to not simply kick people.

He responded by cursing me out...then apologizing the very next minute.

LOL. Bipolar much? This was when he added me as a buddy on facebook, which I ignored. My boyfriend got home, heard the story and promptly deleted him. (He was bugged by curious Anand the previous day about his CS life, clan and so on.)

Good on him for apologizing, but still, wtf? This just shows how people never treat everyone fairly - Anand just suddenly decided I wasn't a hacker after all after he discovered who I am.

I guess names are important, as well as reputation.

Especially clans. If I even suspect/find one member of a clan hacking, the whole clan is dirty to me. I don't immediately accuse them of hacking, but they will always remain fishy to me.

And especially if someone starts cursing me out or talking behind my back, the whole clan is pretty much dead to me. Like Nova, I used to be sort of chummy with some of them, until a couple of their members set me up by asking me to mixmatch with them while I was in Melbourne (lagging), and proceeded to curse and taunt me 'noob, retarded' and etc through the mic for the whole game.

What the..huh? I was stunned nearly speechless when that happened. I was pissed off at first, but now it just seems rather ridiculous and childish to me. Sure, I may not be the best player and I have never claim to be. If anything, random people/friends are the ones saying I'm 'pro' and all that shit -  not me. The only thing I take pride in is being a clean player from the start (2 years ago.)

I have my on days, I have my off days. I still fall off ledges, trip over boxes, bunniehop into walls (if I can even get my bunniehop going) and I can do really retarded things sometimes (like blind myself, which is why I don't use flashbangs - watanoob.)

But yes, I am capable of playing properly if I want and have the mood to. And I dare say much better than most of the retarded newbies that are pouring into Garena recently. I once did a 1v3 in a new map in a cc and came out with a clean score - the guys who I joked with to buy me drinks if I won mysteriously vanished after ganging up to pawn me.

But sometimes, a game is just a game is just a game. Why should I put my heart and soul into something that won't last forever?

Sure, I get really pissed off if I don't improve at something, or make stupid mistakes. But everyone does, and this does not only apply to gaming - but to every other aspect in life, be it work, studies, or relationships.

But in the end, CS is just CS. Why take everything so seriously? My cousins used to maphack in DotA, and I still talk to them. I don't give them the cold shoulder for hacking and I certainly don't curse them out or ridicule them for doing so.

But blood relations and friends are one thing, and strangers online are another. If I don't know you and you're hacking, well, sucks for you cause you ain't ever gonna be respected by me.

Today, my boy suggested that I start doing more 1v1s with good players. I used to balk at that suggestion, saying that there's no point since I'm going to lose anyway.

But now I realise that the point of doing that is not for the glory or satisfaction of winning - it's for the opportunity to learn from others and practice.

Maybe I'll start taking up those challenges I've always shied away from. No one likes to lose, but there will always be a loser (unless there's a tie ;p)

So, anyone up for teaching me some good stuff? And by teaching I don't mean bullying me and then gloating about your victory. I always appreciate pointers :) That day my cute little oli did a 1v1 with me and taught me how to tap an ak.

He let me win (talk about super fong shui -.-) but I guess I still got used to tapping an ak - which was the whole point anyway. 

Basically, what I learned today was: We may never be good enough - but we must always try, or we will never be : )