The world as Stephanie sees it.

So.
This is the Earth.

Yes. This is how the Earth REALLY looks like.

The dirt and stuff that the Earth is made out of is actually on the outside.

A science freak *giggle* asked:

But where's the core? And the mantle?

You see, there IS no core.
Don't believe everything the scientists have told you, they just want to pretend they know everything.

...Have YOU actually been to the center of the earth?
Hah, thought not.

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Another point, the Earth is NOT floating in the center of the universe.
Pah! Floating in space? With nothing to hold it up?
I think not.

It is actually floating in a glass tank.
Filled with 'sea' water.
The sea water is as infinite as you THINK the universe is.

Why doesn't the Earth sink, you ask me.
It IS ball-shaped after all, and water buoyancy wouldn't hold up a dirt ball.

But nooooo, this is sea water, as I have told you.
Much much much denser than normal water.

Pfft, you say.
The scientists are more believable eh?

Then how do you explain how the Earth just hangs in the middle of space, with nothing to hold it up?

Ah. I'd rather believe in Archimedes.

-----------------------------------------

See?
There are holes in the outer layer of the Earth.
Sea water goes in through those holes every time it completes a full circle.

Then wouldn't the whole Earth drown?

No.
When the weather gets hot, the water evaporates into the sky and is sucked into the black hole sitting in the center of the universe.

So that explains why the sea is still relatively clean after trillions of years.

Of course, this filtering process is not 100% percent effective (much like those Diamond water filters,) so filth still gathers in the ocean, albeit at a much slower pace.

-----------------------------------------

If there is no sun, and no space, then how does the Earth orbit?

Ah, this is where spiritual belief comes in.

The Earth is full of Sinners.

When they die and are buried six feet under, they decompose and defuse through the Earth to emerge whole again on the other side.

In hell.

They are condemned to keep the Earth spinning FOREVER!
They have to run forward while the Earth spins backward (like a hamster wheel.)

Whilst being perpetually burnt to a crisp.

So the concept of hell still exists.

-----------------------------------------

Why are we a glass tank, you may ask?

What is our purpose?

You see, we exist at the whim of God.
This glass tank is actually an old fish tank Mother Nature gave him to put his 'Earth' in.

He watches over our daily lives and chuckles when we amuse him.

-----------------------------------------

HOWEVER, while God can rejoice in light of his creation, God can also get ANGRY.
This normally happens when a mother abandons her baby, or too many of his good friend Mother Nature's trees get cut down.

THEN, descends the mighty finger of God.

-----------------------------------------

POKE!

And the Earth is submerged in sea water!
Excess water flows into Earth, and TSUNAMIS occur!

-----------------------------------------

If he gets REALLY angry, he pokes the Earth yet again!

The fires of hell dip into the ocean water and turn into steam, heating up our planet.

LO, GLOBAL WARMING!

The more sinners there are, the more abundant the flames of hell.
And that, explains the increasing rate of global warming.

-----------------------------------------

So, the moral of the story is:

Don't believe everything you read in Science text books, and NEVER, EVER, piss God off.

Amen.


Song of the Day:

"No More Sorrow - Linkin Park"

*hums*