How much are they worth to you?
Do you keep your mind open about a person, or do you judge them from the first few moments with them?
I think on a certain level, everyone subconsciously takes the first impression as the most lasting judgment.
For me, I find that it's very hard to change my opinion on a person once I've tasted that all-important first impression.
But how can you judge someone's attitude from the first time you meet them?
How can you tell what they're like in real life?
What if the person was in a really bad mood on that day, or if the person had decided to ditch a decade's worth of bitchiness to be nice to you that day?
Despite all the variables presented, I admit I still judge a book by its cover nearly every, if not all the time.
And the funny thing is, many people can meet the same person at the same time and hear the same thing, but form different views of that person.
Take Catherine for example.
When I first met her, I thought she was a fairly nice person, albeit a bit on the dumb side with no resolve and backbone at all. But not innately evil, I must say. She's too naive to be evil.
When Vivienne first met her, she wrote her off straight away. 'Fucking dumb and stupid.'
When Swarna first mer her, she liked her. 'She's a nice person! Very sociable too - she has so many friends. Outside our class, at least.'
Viv and I met her at the same time.
Both of us hung out at her house during the first official week of college.
I still remember - Viv was slouching on Cat's pillows, Whay Ying and Chermine on the floor, mainly texting, while I leaned against the bed and stoned.
Viv was talking animatedly - yelling obscenities every now and then, while Catherine looked on with a disapproving look in her eyes. I said nothing.
Viv wanted to borrow a shirt, so she made Catherine run through her entire wardrobe for her.
Some shirts were too small, some too big, some too childish. And Viv was scolding Cat for the way she folded her clothes. Not in a mean way, yet I was surprised when Cat didn't utter a word in her defense.
=/
That was when my opinion of her fell a little.
It plummeted further when I went for lunch with her a few days later, with Swarna, Chermine and a few others in tow.
Out of the blue, she started talking about Viv.
And how she didn't like her.
I remember Swarna agreeing heartily. =/
Later on, Swarna grew to like Viv despite her constant teasings and profanities.
And she grew to tolerate Cat less, due to her bimbotic demeanor in class.
While all this was happening, I remember both Viv and Swarna trying to paint a different picture of Catherine for me.
Viv said that she was useless la, don't need to talk to her wan. Damn annoying and stupid lo. Tell her to go away next time la, no need to be so nice de.
Swarna said that she could not, for anything in her life, understand why people didn't really like her. Give her a chance, she said. What did she ever do to you?
._.
Still, I sat on the fence, swaying to neither Viv's criticisms nor Swarna's reasonings.
Until today, my opinion of her remains the same from the first day I saw her.
Maybe there's something to say about trusting first impressions after all.
Maybe it was the way she touched my arm when she talked to me.
Or maybe it was the way she giggled.
Or maybe it was the way she gets all annoyed when someone refuses a request.
But somehow, something told me that she wasn't going to be a very nice person to be with.
=/
Some of my friends know me for being a quick judge while playing DotA.
I can play one game with a person, and without me ever conversing with him or her, decide whether I like the person or not.
For example, Fariz, the clan leader of [MoD]
I played one game with him and disliked him upon sight.
The way he talked, the way he belittled others.
I didn't like him and told Arief so.
"He's okay, give him a chance. He's actually a nice person, only sometimes he has a temper."
Who knew that a couple of months later he'd come to me all upset - cause he and Fariz had a huge fight cause he finally got the guts to criticise his attitude and challenge him as clan lord?
._.''
I didn't say I told you so - but it certainly passed through my mind at some point or other.
Many people have scolded me for not giving him a chance.
=/ Well, I didn't do anything to him and I don't owe him anything, so I am not obliged to try and make nice with a person I dislike.
Yet, I tried to learn to give second chances.
Tried.
Zerick was another one.
I wrote him off at roughly the same time as Fariz, for nearly the same reasons.
Nicky said, give him a chance - he's a nice person, REALLY.
I just got on his bad side.
Understandably, Nic stood for him, as they'd been friends longer.
I dug my heels in and refused to talk nor unban Zerick.
After some pressure from clan mates, I gave in.
Mistake.
At first he was all sickly sweet - sucking up and saying nice things and conversing mannerfully.
But the moment his temper soured, he unleashed all manner of insults upon me.
Needless to say, I never bothered with him again.
The third person would be none other than...
gee gee cereal.
Wrote him off the moment he flamed me in public - can a person not discuss matters privately?
Was he so severely lacking in balls that he needed people to back him up?
Was his ego so fragile that he couldn't handle complaining privately?
Was he so starved for attention that he couldn't just move on to the next game instead of swearing to high hell in public?
Was his idea of 'pride' so horribly distorted that kicking him from a game for bad behaviour in considered 'disrespecting another player'?
My impression of him had already formed from the moment he started spamming in my game.
No good can ever come from spammers - unless they're friends of the host.
The open envelope of the first impression was quickly and firmly sealed by me watching him flame me out in the open.
Even Viv was pissed.
Without me even telling her to, she screwed him verbally so badly I doubt his ego was even functioning the next day.
I blocked + banned him and tried to forget all about him.
I succeeded for a while.
Then Terence, omg Terence somehow managed to plant a seed of sympathy.
I had this thought that he was a childish, fickle-minded, insincere person who needed some kindness.
Well, I was 3/4 correct.
Oh wells.
-exhale-
No good ever came of second chances.
I shall stop giving them, then.
Saves my effort. ^^
Right?
Song of the Day:
"Devil's Party - INXS"
I forgot what I was blogging about - ran off to play and came back 90 minutes later, mind blank.
Haha. Hence the discontinuity of the post.
Do you keep your mind open about a person, or do you judge them from the first few moments with them?
I think on a certain level, everyone subconsciously takes the first impression as the most lasting judgment.
For me, I find that it's very hard to change my opinion on a person once I've tasted that all-important first impression.
But how can you judge someone's attitude from the first time you meet them?
How can you tell what they're like in real life?
What if the person was in a really bad mood on that day, or if the person had decided to ditch a decade's worth of bitchiness to be nice to you that day?
Despite all the variables presented, I admit I still judge a book by its cover nearly every, if not all the time.
And the funny thing is, many people can meet the same person at the same time and hear the same thing, but form different views of that person.
Take Catherine for example.
When I first met her, I thought she was a fairly nice person, albeit a bit on the dumb side with no resolve and backbone at all. But not innately evil, I must say. She's too naive to be evil.
When Vivienne first met her, she wrote her off straight away. 'Fucking dumb and stupid.'
When Swarna first mer her, she liked her. 'She's a nice person! Very sociable too - she has so many friends. Outside our class, at least.'
Viv and I met her at the same time.
Both of us hung out at her house during the first official week of college.
I still remember - Viv was slouching on Cat's pillows, Whay Ying and Chermine on the floor, mainly texting, while I leaned against the bed and stoned.
Viv was talking animatedly - yelling obscenities every now and then, while Catherine looked on with a disapproving look in her eyes. I said nothing.
Viv wanted to borrow a shirt, so she made Catherine run through her entire wardrobe for her.
Some shirts were too small, some too big, some too childish. And Viv was scolding Cat for the way she folded her clothes. Not in a mean way, yet I was surprised when Cat didn't utter a word in her defense.
=/
That was when my opinion of her fell a little.
It plummeted further when I went for lunch with her a few days later, with Swarna, Chermine and a few others in tow.
Out of the blue, she started talking about Viv.
And how she didn't like her.
I remember Swarna agreeing heartily. =/
Later on, Swarna grew to like Viv despite her constant teasings and profanities.
And she grew to tolerate Cat less, due to her bimbotic demeanor in class.
While all this was happening, I remember both Viv and Swarna trying to paint a different picture of Catherine for me.
Viv said that she was useless la, don't need to talk to her wan. Damn annoying and stupid lo. Tell her to go away next time la, no need to be so nice de.
Swarna said that she could not, for anything in her life, understand why people didn't really like her. Give her a chance, she said. What did she ever do to you?
._.
Still, I sat on the fence, swaying to neither Viv's criticisms nor Swarna's reasonings.
Until today, my opinion of her remains the same from the first day I saw her.
Maybe there's something to say about trusting first impressions after all.
Maybe it was the way she touched my arm when she talked to me.
Or maybe it was the way she giggled.
Or maybe it was the way she gets all annoyed when someone refuses a request.
But somehow, something told me that she wasn't going to be a very nice person to be with.
=/
Some of my friends know me for being a quick judge while playing DotA.
I can play one game with a person, and without me ever conversing with him or her, decide whether I like the person or not.
For example, Fariz, the clan leader of [MoD]
I played one game with him and disliked him upon sight.
The way he talked, the way he belittled others.
I didn't like him and told Arief so.
"He's okay, give him a chance. He's actually a nice person, only sometimes he has a temper."
Who knew that a couple of months later he'd come to me all upset - cause he and Fariz had a huge fight cause he finally got the guts to criticise his attitude and challenge him as clan lord?
._.''
I didn't say I told you so - but it certainly passed through my mind at some point or other.
Many people have scolded me for not giving him a chance.
=/ Well, I didn't do anything to him and I don't owe him anything, so I am not obliged to try and make nice with a person I dislike.
Yet, I tried to learn to give second chances.
Tried.
Zerick was another one.
I wrote him off at roughly the same time as Fariz, for nearly the same reasons.
Nicky said, give him a chance - he's a nice person, REALLY.
I just got on his bad side.
Understandably, Nic stood for him, as they'd been friends longer.
I dug my heels in and refused to talk nor unban Zerick.
After some pressure from clan mates, I gave in.
Mistake.
At first he was all sickly sweet - sucking up and saying nice things and conversing mannerfully.
But the moment his temper soured, he unleashed all manner of insults upon me.
Needless to say, I never bothered with him again.
The third person would be none other than...
gee gee cereal.
Wrote him off the moment he flamed me in public - can a person not discuss matters privately?
Was he so severely lacking in balls that he needed people to back him up?
Was his ego so fragile that he couldn't handle complaining privately?
Was he so starved for attention that he couldn't just move on to the next game instead of swearing to high hell in public?
Was his idea of 'pride' so horribly distorted that kicking him from a game for bad behaviour in considered 'disrespecting another player'?
My impression of him had already formed from the moment he started spamming in my game.
No good can ever come from spammers - unless they're friends of the host.
The open envelope of the first impression was quickly and firmly sealed by me watching him flame me out in the open.
Even Viv was pissed.
Without me even telling her to, she screwed him verbally so badly I doubt his ego was even functioning the next day.
I blocked + banned him and tried to forget all about him.
I succeeded for a while.
Then Terence, omg Terence somehow managed to plant a seed of sympathy.
I had this thought that he was a childish, fickle-minded, insincere person who needed some kindness.
Well, I was 3/4 correct.
Oh wells.
-exhale-
No good ever came of second chances.
I shall stop giving them, then.
Saves my effort. ^^
Right?
Song of the Day:
"Devil's Party - INXS"
I forgot what I was blogging about - ran off to play and came back 90 minutes later, mind blank.
Haha. Hence the discontinuity of the post.
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